February is the month when we are prompted to think about “true love”. What is true love? I often hear people speak of love quantitatively as in “I love him/her sooo much”. I think a much better measure of love is the quality of love rather than the quantity of it. I notice that too often that love is conditional and causes many problems in relationships, particularly marriage relationships. “I love him/her so much” often means “I feel good about that person as long as they are treating me as I want to be treated and make me feel good about myself.”
So what is quality, true love? It is a love that is based on a commitment to do what is best for the other person even if that is difficult to do or is costly. It is a love that sticks through hard times when the other person may not have anything to offer. It is a love that forgives without punishing and keeps your heart open in the relationship. It is a love that is even willing to say difficult things that need to be heard knowing that it may temporarily bring discord or conflict into a relationship. True love is of course best defined and described by 1 Corinthians 13, the famous love chapter in Scripture. “Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It is not rude, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres” (I Corinthians 13:4-8). This love is the love that God demonstrates to all of us daily and ultimately in the gift of His Son to redeem us. God help us to love more like you!