Seeking help for yourself and starting counseling can be easy to put off. It takes work to find the right counselor and taking an honest look at your life can be hard work as well. However the benefits are typically great as growth occurs, relationships improve and emotional symptoms are shed and the cost of not addressing problems these problems is great. Listed below are some common reasons people don’t seek counseling.
•“My problems aren’t THAT big.”
•“I don’t want to start looking at things because I don’t know what else is there.”
•“I’m not crazy.”
•“What will people think?”
•“I don’t want to be weak.”
•“I don’t have time.”
•“I can tough it out.”
•“Sounds like too much work.”
•“My problem is unique and no one can help me.”
•“It sounds like work—why would I want to do that?”
So how do you find a counselor? One of the best ways is to talk to others who have been in counseling and who have had a satisfying experience. There are also many referral lists that exist based on specific issues. Try googling the specific problem you want to address and you will probably find links to specific therapists. Organizations your trust can also be a good resource in finding a counselor. Focus on the Family maintains a national counselor referral list, EMDR Therapy Network has a national listing of therapists trained in EMDR, and your local church or pastor can also be a good resource.
When you get to the point of making that first phone call, it’s a good idea to have a list of questions to ask. Therapists are used to fielding questions about the work they do and many will give a complimentary phone or 30 minute session to help you decide if they are the right therapist for you. I generally tell clients that once you start counseling with someone it is reasonable to expect from the beginning that you are getting new insights or help in your situation that you didn’t think of before.
(10 reasons people avoid counseling is borrowed from my good friend and skilled therapist Kay Simmeth www.kaysimmethlmft.com)